Face The Truth
by Self-san
Summary: She wasn't normal and she certainly wasn't Yuuki Cross. AU.


Disclaimer: I don't ever plan on claiming to own or profit from this story.

At first, she didn't know where she was. It came to her sometime after, as the cold sunk into her face, that she was in snow. _What was snow?_ she asked herself. _Snow is not red_, someone inside answered her. As the voice sounded in her mind, she grabbed at her head. It hurt, and she felt tears run down her face as the pain seemed to grow.

She didn't hear the man approach.

It was the rough voice grating in her ears that made her jerk her face towards the sound. A man. _What was man?_ she asked again. She soon regretted it as pain struck again. She thought about sounding out, but something stopped her. It felt like the voice only softer, barely brushing her thoughts as she stood in the deep snow. She wouldn't cry. She was stronger than that.

But, the man. There was something…_wrong_ with him. She knew this as she stared into his glowing eyes, watched as drool dropped in a thick line down his chin and he twitched his fingers. He smiled and she saw bright white points between his lips. It shocked her to her core, and she couldn't move as he walked closer, his smile widening and his fingers reaching for her shoulders.

He said something again, in that strange sound of grabbled nonsense, and she tensed as he moved his head closer to her neck. _What was he doing?_ she wondered, staring curiously at his bedraggled coat and tattered scarf.

She didn't have long to wondered, because soon pain burned through her to her numb fingers and toes. She could vaguely hear herself shriek. He had bit her. She felt something wet slid down her shoulder. Could bodies shed tears? _Was her body…crying?_

Her head got light and she stopped screaming, trying to thrash against his tight grip. He growled and shook his teeth in her neck.

Like a terrier with a rat, he wasn't letting go. She found her eyes rolling into darkness and her body going limp. _He was killing her?_ She lay quiet in his arms, not knowing what exactly was happening. She couldn't even scream. She tried, but it didn't work.

Then, she found her voice as the man was ripped from her. She screamed. She fell to the cold ground and watched as a fountain of body-tears flew through the air. Some landed on her face and hand. She stared at the red stuff, but slowly brought her shaking hand to her face. She felt like sleeping, she was so tired, but curiosity won and she sniffed her red hand, dazed.

It smelled alright, so she licked it hesitantly. What had happened to make him tear she thought as she began to doze. A high, frightened voice brought her back, hands on her shoulders and that wacky nonsense woke her more. It made her angry. She was just going to sleep. She batted at the hands, but they gripped her face. They were warm and stuck to her skin some.

She realized it was a boy. _What is a boy?_ He was talking fast, but she couldn't understand. His long nails pressed softly into her skin. Her eyes closed some and he shook her. She screamed as she felt her shoulder again. It burned, painful in a way she hadn't thought possible.

He was still talking, but she stared at him, uncomprehending. His brow crinkled, and he dipped his head to her shoulder. Like the man. She screamed and thrashed, but he held her still.

Soon her shoulder didn't hurt so much. She stopped fighting and shrieking. The dark haired boy hesitantly pulled back. She watched him lick the body-tears off of his lips and canted her head.

She didn't fight him as he picked her up. It was a strange hold, his arms supporting her legs and her arms around his neck. He was still talking, his mouth next to her ear.

It sounded choppy and short, but it was still interesting to her wandering mind. He shook her every time he felt her start to sleep. Sometimes his voice picked up, almost screaming in her ear, and sometimes it was so quiet, she strained to hear.

Tucking further into his shoulder, she refused to whimper as he jostled her shoulder again and again. It was starting to hurt more, and after a particularly nasty stumble on his part, she couldn't help the leaking tears. They made him stop and pull back to look at her face. She blinked at him as he set her back down in the…

She looked around, noticing that they weren't in the snow anymore. The ground was hard and black beneath her feet. She wanted to touch it, but the boy grabbed her fingers. He looked at her hard and pushed back her- what was the thing on her head? She pulled at it, but he got her hands again. Hold soft, but firm, he dipped his head to her shoulder. It didn't feel so bad after he pulled back and picked her up again. He seemed to walk carefully after that. She could barely even feel it.

Soon there was crunching underneath and she fought to look down around the fuzzy thing on her head. When she managed she saw they were walking over small stones. Then, the boy was putting her down again. She was ready to push away his head if she needed to. Her shoulder didn't hurt.

But he was reaching out one hand while another pulled her close to his side. A loud sound filled the silent night air and she jumped. Why was he hitting a wall? _Wall?_ She let out a small shriek as the wall was opened and a man walked out, ducking behind the boy as the light from inside the wall burned her eyes. She blinked and scrubbed at them with impotent hands.

The man and they boy started talking in garbled voices. _What were they saying? _She pressed herself more against the boy's back, burying her cold nose into the damp cloth of his coat. _Was the man like the one before?_ She shuddered at the though.

The voices stopped and she peeked around the boy. The man was looking at her. She stared back until the boy pushed her forward with a gentle nudge.

She resisted, catching the man's eyes. She held them, and knew that he wouldn't hurt her. His eyes were kind, warm, and she let herself be led into the house.

It was warm inside, hot on her cold limbs. When they stopped in a room with _giants_, she fumbled with getting her coat off. The boy was there, kneeling and helping her with the flat, slippery disks. She watched him work until she noticed his hand.

She snatched at it and brought it closer to her face. It was cold, and she pressed it to her cheek, glad for the cool. But still she wondered. When it was warm again, she let it go and inspected it. It was still covered in body-tears, but she didn't care. She was looking for the long things that had pressed into her face.

She ran her fingers over the ends until he spoke, tilting her head to look at him. His dark red eyes burned into hers, but she didn't care. She held up his hand and tugged on his fingers. His brow furrowed and she pointed to the no longer sharp things as she ran a hand over the crease between his eyes, smoothing it.

He said a word. She tried to repeat it as he pulled his hand from her hold. She shrugged out of the coat and picked it up from the floor, realizing then that the man was gone.

The boy tried to take it from her put she pulled the wet cloth closer and moved to the fuzzy patch covering the floor. She laid it out and… she stopped, staring at the square piece of cloth in front of her. She had…_done_ something to it. Her mouth screwed with concentration and she shook it out and tried again, trying to see how it had gotten its shape.

She watched at it happened again without her realizing it. She started over again. And again, and again. Frustration welled hot and thick in her stomach. Her hands were wet and the coat was covered in body-tears by the time she figured out what was happening. Her stomach calmed.

She was moving the coat in a certain pattern until it was square. She wanted to try again, but the boy stopped her, taking the coat and shaking it out to hang on a hook in the corner.

She looked at him as she sat on the carpet where the coat had been. He picked her up and put her on a squishy giant, sitting next to her and hugging her to his side. He laid his head on hers and talked it that strange garble. She saw the man come back through the door with a… something in his hands. He gave her it and a long shiny thing.

She poked at it from under the boy's arm while they conversed. The thing was hollow and it had a clear something inside. She sniffed it. It didn't smell like body-tears. She didn't know if that was a good thing or not. After all, she reasoned, the boy smelled like body-tears, and so did she. It couldn't be bad, right?

She looked up when the boy moved away from her and the man moved in front of her. She looked from one to another. The man's mouth moved upwards and he said something. She squinted her eyes at him and he said it again. Uki? What was uki?

She frowned and shook her head. She reached a hand to his throat and felt vibrations as he said it again, slowly. Yuuukiiii. No, that didn't sound right. She shook her head again, and he looked at the boy next to her. She just frowned and tried to do what he did, but differently, better than him. It came out sounding like, sceeenne, to her, but he repeated it, and it sounded…good.

Sen, he said. She repeated it, her hand still on his throat. It sounded right. She nodded and tried to do that mouth up thing that he did, but the boy didn't. She thought it worked from the reflecting one that he gave her as he said it again. Sen. Yes.

She looked to the boy, and he gave a crooked mouth movement. She scooted closer to him and put a finger to him mouth, moving it like the man's had. She stopped when she felt something hard under her fingertip.

He opened his mouth and she stared at the bright white points he had. She touched one, gently rubbing it. His eyes were wide as she drew her hand away. She tried to do the mouth up thing. He returned it and she pressed her mouth to his.

Pulling back, she grabbed at the hollow thing with the clear stuff and the long shiny thing. She gave it to the boy and watched as he held the shiny thing and grabbed the clear stuff with it. He held it out to her and she moved to grab it with her hand. He pulled back and opened his mouth saying some aaaaaa thing.

She frowned and copied him. He put the stuff in her mouth. She clicked her teeth on the shiny thing. He tried to pull it back. She held it. They stared, neither willing to back down. He made a loud sound and she let it go, trying to keep the clear stuff inside her. She swallowed. It…was different.

They repeated, the boy garbling something out as they did it again. She ignored it, until he set down the hollow thing and stood. She followed him as they moved back the way they came.

He stopped and turned, kneeling in front of her. She looked at him, and he put his mouth on hers and stood. The man had a hand on her shoulder as she reached for him. The boy was leaving. She cried as she watched him walk away without a backwards glance.

The next few weeks were what they were. The man, Kaien, talked to her constantly and she soon picked up on things. The squishy giants were _chairs_. The stuff she put in her mouth was either 'food' or 'not food.' She had to admit, it was…funny to see Kaien's face when she put things not food into her mouth. She was careful to stick to books and clothing. She didn't know how, but she had a feeling that things like knifes and sharp metal pieces wouldn't be good.

So far, she felt the most important thing she had learned was the boy. He was Kaname. Coming in for a close second was that she was Sen.

She didn't much like baths, she now knew. The water…she wasn't afraid of it, but she was careful. Like the not food things, she knew that she shouldn't get into all of that water. The one time Kaien had put her in, she had sat very still and had refused to put her head under. She barely breathed and kept quiet, vaguely aware that she shouldn't wake things better left asleep.

After that, she got to take showers. And that Kaien never came in with her.

She learned how to talk, asking for things during their daily lessons about everything. She picked up on things like a sponge, Kaien said. She wanted to know how she was like what she washed with. That led to a lesson on figures of speech. She enjoyed that almost as much as she hated the blocky figures he was trying to teach her to read with. Which was a lot.

But she got it, eventually, and soon it was winter again. She hadn't seen much of Kaname, but when she did, she made sure to hug him and love on him. It wasn't much, but their quiet minutes with her holding him seemed to lessen the pain in his chest. The dark blackish-green was almost all the way gone one time. She also made sure to wave at the yellow-blue boy in the car Kaname came in.

She faced the truth. But it was hard. Often, she wondered if she wasn't crazy, if she wasn't sick. She imagined that she was just dreaming it all.

But no.

It was normal, she came to realize as she got a little older, a little more aware, that she could see colors in people. Kaien was a very pretty purple-yellow most of the time. It reminded her of violets and butter. Kaname, however, was almost always cobalt-red, with spots of blackish-green and sometimes, if she was really unlucky, royal purple.

It was funny to think about, she knew, that people had their own color scales. It wasn't really hard to figure out an individual's, though. Purple for Kaien was great, but purple for Kaname was horrible. She hated purple-Kaname with his frosty eyes and neat brown hair.

She twirled a finger through her own waves and though about the other strange occurrences that happened with her. With only her, it seemed.

Like how she knew when Kaien had killed something. The presence in the corner of his office showed to that, or how both Kaien and Kaname both had these… overlays of respective black-metal/pure blue and shinning silver-metal/pure blue. She knew that they were…different. Kaname had fangs and Kaien kept a 9mm Beretta in his top drawer.

But… why didn't some of the people in town have what they had? The lady who looked after her when Kaien was gone didn't have it. But…then again, lots of people had what Kaname had, only…darker. The silver sheen nowhere near as bright with them as it was on Kaname, but not black metal like Kaien's either.

She learned that these were vampires. Beasts in human form, they drank the blood of humans, those without the silver inside. It raised the question of why Kaname was brighter. Like an eternal flame in comparison to a match flash, there was no comparison. She couldn't exactly ask though. Something, that voice inside really, told her that it wasn't the right thing to do. She didn't question it as she often didn't.

It was smart. It knew things that she couldn't. It saved her from the vampire in town when she had had to meet Kaname there. No fear, it had whispered, eyes down, confident posture, breath normally. It had commanded her, and she had moved like a loyal dog. Kaname had shown up after that, and she had pushed aside her curiosity to be happy with him.

She rubbed soothingly at her throat. Her fingers met smooth, crinkled skin. She scratched at it absently with her long nails. The mass of scar tissue that decorated her neck was a part of her everyday life. She couldn't even cover most of it with the palm of her hand, though. It was a large portion of her skin.

When she had been five, she had been attacked by a vampire. She had been saved by Kaname, but it had almost been too late. The vampire had liked to double bite, and had been ripped out in the act of re-puncturing. His fangs had sliced her throat, trying to find purchase and failing. The scars did a pattern of sinking deeper, then less, in long ravaged lines. These marks surrounded the multiple bites in the center. Those were the deepest.

They made her neck sensitive, and she wore a collar when she finally went to school for the first time. Sometimes though, she didn't. The other kids had made fun of her, and she had to admit, it had hurt a little at first. But soon, she just got annoyed at the pointing and horrified stares as they moved up in grade. That led to her pulling her hair up. Her bangs fell thickly and she pulled out a piece or two by her ears to frame her face, but the rest was up in a high tail. The style framed her neck nicely, clearly putting her scars on parade. She liked it.

When she was home, she often wore it the same, only letting it down to sleep. It still fell in thick waves down her back, even if it was up. She wanted them to look, to be horrified; it'd toughen them up for sure. The thought was vindictive, but she found that she was often critical and cynical when it came to the rest of the world, even at her young age.

Except Kaien. And Kaname…And Momoyama-san. With them she found it hard to be sarcastic or cutting.

She was as sweet as she could stand with Kaname. He deserved it.

The teachers saw her as a model student. She was polite. The children didn't much like her though. She didn't like them much either, so it was okay. She had a low tolerance for stupidity, and she found that she was… different, academically and mentally, than most. She was good at the memorization of things, being able to read it once and have it stored if she wanted to. She was also mature, something that didn't make her very popular when she told the teacher of her fellow students actions.

She still worried sometimes. She wasn't like the other kids, and that hurt. She longed for normalcy sometimes. How was she so different? She liked pink. She liked dolls. She liked hair ribbons and she was sure that she would be able to play house well, if anyone gave her a chance.

It was enough to make her cry. And she did, mostly at night before she went to sleep. Playing dolly with Kaien or Kaname was different than playing with girls her age.

By the age of eleven, she felt ancient. She knew it wasn't normal. Like seeing colors or feeling the things in the house or hearing whispers of thoughts from Kaien, she was, yet again, different.

She closed the book she was reading and set it aside, removing her hand from her neck. She wasn't very good at math, so she tried to read more, hoping it would make more sense. It didn't, and she made a note to tell Kaien that she needed to stay after school for free tutoring.

Hoping down from her desk, she padded barefoot to the bathroom. Kaien would be home soon, and he liked baths. Setting it up, she put the towels on the warmer and started the bathwater, making it scalding. It would cool nicely for him if he got home on time like he said he would. She frowned, tilting her head. She thought she had heard- yep. She shut off the water and walked downstairs. Kaien was home. And early from what her watch was telling her.

About to call out a welcome, she stopped. There was a boy in Kaien's jacket. His silver hair gleamed dully in the light and his amethyst eyes looked dead. Body-tears, she shook herself mentally of the old habit. Blood clotted in his hair and covered his hands. The jacket shoulder looked to be soaked in it.

She shivered as she stared at the boy. Her height, he was swimming in Kaien's jacket. But what had her frozen were the colors. So many, so pretty… and so strange, too she noted as she watched colors swim and swirl.

She vaguely heard Kaien say something about giving him a bath and she nodded, watching the colors. As she approached him, she was careful. He looked… close to doing something. What, she didn't know, but it worried her. Like the silver/black-metal war that was clashing and churning under his skin of emotion, it made her chest ache and her stomach roll.

She swallowed thickly, the smell of blood tickling her nose. She breathed deeply the coppery scent and decided that it was now or never.

"Come on, I already have a bath ready." She gently touched his arm and led him upstairs. As she thought about what Kaien had told her, she was glad that she was wearing a turtle neck. She didn't think that Zero would've wanted to see that after his loved ones' slaughter.

The bathroom was hot, and she pulled off her long socks and rolled up her thick sleeves after she closed the door.

She gently peeled off the jacket and ran the sink with cold water, dunking it in. That would take care of the stain.

Her hair was already up, so she stared at him. He didn't move, his shattered eyes holding hers. She went about undressing him.

It seemed…so routine. She felt the thick, holding feeling at the back of her throat that came before the unusual happened. She pulled off his underwear and helped him into the shower, holding the cold shower head away from him. When it was warm water, she slowly put it back up. All he did was stand there.

She tightened her pony tail decisively and stepped inside with him. He was naked, but she didn't really notice as she slowly washed him. The blood came off pink and thin, and she was relieved to see his pale, perfectly whole neck.

Afterwards, she dried and wrapped him up in a towel to sit on the counter. Her clothes stuck wetly to her but she ignored it. The feeling was gone from the back of her throat, and she was grateful.

She didn't look at Zero's colors; instead, she wrung out her clothes and hair and led him to her room. She left Kaien his jacket in the sink, soaking merrily. The tube lay forgotten.

She didn't know where Kaien wanted him, but he needed somewhere to stay awake. She could stay with him there.

She sat him on her bed and grabbed a change of comfy, sleep worthy clothing, moving behind her changing screen to re-dress. She quickly changed underwear and pulled on a pair of baggy gym shorts. They came past her knees and were slick under her fingers. She cursed her lack of turtleneck sleep shirts even as she took down her damp hair and scurried into an undershirt. She brushed the brown mass over her shoulders and moved out, grabbing a pair of shorts and an old too big tee-shirt for him to wear.

He was exactly where she left him; staring at her plain pink bedspread and wrapped in a thick, fluffy towel.

She walked over to him and pulled him out of the towel. He didn't struggle and lifted his arms for her as she put the shirt on him. His shorts, he actually put on himself, something that soothed the worry in her. Maybe he was in shock.

_Then it's a good thing you put him in that shower_, the voice reasoned back. She stopped. The voice had never really responded to her before. She shook it off when she felt his eyes on her. She smiled gently at him. He looked at her, a little confused if she read it right, and she moved to sit on her floor and lean against her wall. She took the spot closest to the door. He followed, sitting between her and the wardrobe.

He folded in on himself, and she sat still when he pressed their legs together. He leaned more into her and she leaned back. She was there; he didn't need to worry for now.

It was well into the morning when she felt him fall asleep, his head lolling against her shoulder. She fought the urge to shudder as his breath fell hotly on her scared neck.

Kaien had already been in once to check on them, and she had shooed him off silently. She could miss the day of school, she was ahead enough. Zero needed her more.

Staring at the lightening sky from the gap in her curtains, she breathed deeply. She couldn't move or she'd wake Zero. Her butt was asleep and had been for a long time, but Zero would get a crick in his neck if he slept on her like he was…and she had to pee.

She decided to risk it. He walked, dozing all the while, when she led him to her bed. It was a twin, comfy and warm, and she put him into the wall. Away from the window, away from the door, they were good to go.

Running to the bathroom, she didn't wash her face or brush her teeth for the sake of time. And she then crawled into bed with Zero at her back. She fell asleep instantly.

She awoke with shock at a loud cry and as fingers curled their way over her neck. She grabbed the wrist before she realized that all they were doing was touching her scar. Blinking awake, she saw silver hair and relaxed some. The light in the window told her it was almost night again.

She let go of his wrist and looked at him. His eyes were wide, his breath quick. She could see the hatred in his chest and tone when he uttered the first word she'd ever heard from him.

"_Vampire_," he hissed as his eyes narrowed and his fingers brushed back more of her hair.

His gaze was disgusted and she tugged at his hand. His eyes snapped to hers and they shinned with anger. She almost flinched before she caught herself.

"I was five," she said hesitantly, not sure if he wanted to hear it.

"It wasn't my _fault_," she said more quietly. She wondered if that anger was really directed at her.

He looked confused, then apologetic, and then angry. So fast, it made her head swirl.

He brushed at her neck again, gently touching the bumpy and creased skin.

"_Beasts_," he said lowly, his hand trembling. He bared his teeth at the thought.

She sat up and reached for him. His whole body shook, but she didn't let go. She wondered if she could, even. Smelling the shampoo in his hair and the clean scent of his skin, she held him tightly as their cheeks touched.

He didn't cry, he didn't scream, he did nothing but shake. She held him close and waited it out. He needed her, and she swore silently that she'd be there. He didn't need to tell her anything, she'd just…be there for him. She could do that.

When it was over she pulled back. He looked her in the eye as his fingers brushed her neck again. She smiled. He nodded, slowly, and she led him from her room to the kitchen. Breakfast was the most important meal of the day, after all.

It suddenly didn't matter if she wasn't normal; she doubted that Zero would care about that. And…she could have a _friend_. A real friend.

Really, she was almost giddy at the prospect.


End file.
